Parking vigilante warned, then urged to apply at SPD

SEATTLE – Police are investigating what they call a ‘passive-aggressive parking vigilante’ in North Seattle.

Earlier this year, someone took it upon themselves to paint unofficial parking lines along Whitman Avenue N near 41st Street. Last week, a woman received a nasty note on her car after she parked outside those unofficial lines.

According to a news release, the note said:

“Please do everyone a favor on this block, either learn how to park your car like a normal human being or put a bullet in your face you worthless piece of . Go [expletive] yourself and have a bad day. Sincerely, Everyone.”

While she believes it might be a neighbor who has complained in the past, Seattle Police are asking neighbors to find productive solutions. In fact, Seattle Police say anyone really interested in parking should pursue a career in its parking enforcement division. In a cheeky matter, the qualifications include 'remaining calm and emotionally detached in tough situations, and be a tactful, courteous communicator who has not smoked Angel Dust within the last five years. Must like dogs.'

No word if any applications have been filed out.